Rhode Island Divorce Tips

Divorce Coaching has taken on several different meanings in the past few years.  There is a wide diversity between what one person means by a Divorce Coach as compared to what another person means.  Substantially, I have found that divorce coaches may (1) be a coach to help a person in a divorce move forward in their life after the divorce proceeding is over by helping the person being coached to focus on the promise that the future holds, or in another instance a person may (2) may be a coach for spouses going through a divorce so they can amicably resolve their emotional issues and realize that while their relationship doesn't work as husband and wife and divorce is going to occur, they can each move forward without hatred, looking at the promise of the future and the positive influence they can have on each other and/or their children.

The fact is, not everyone can afford a divorce lawyer, even with the affordability that I attempt to provide in my law practice.  Yet everyone should have access to some sort of professional legal assistance.  At the same time, professional legal services that take years of schooling and diligent effort are not without significant value and worthy of compensation.

However, these two issues do find a way to blend with one another with compromise between client and lawyer.  This is where you find the client seeking a lawyer for divorce coaching.  By engaging a Rhode Island divorce attorney who is willing to coach you through a divorce or family law situation, you are provided with valuable information that attorney has learned through practice and now passes on to you to help you handle your own divorce matter or to help you deal with the more crucial parts of the process such as the initial divorce filing, how the hearing should proceed, the timing of the interlocutory order that should enter following your divorce hearing, and the procedure for entry of the final judgment of divorce. 

With such coaching you spend time with the attorney who provides you with his or her knowledge and experience to try to guide you through the process without requiring the attorney to represent you in the process.  By removing the attorney from the representation portion of the divorce, you make the attorney available to coach others, you limit the divorce attorney's liability and you undertake your own representation with the help of a professional to guide you through it.  This, of course, results in a substantially reduced price since your legal divorce coach can assist you by telephone, in person or by email but does not have to dress for and travel to court, pay for parking, wait for your case to be called, and spend other valuable time that could be used helping other clients but which you might end up paying for if the attorney is left unavailable for other work.

The legal divorce coach is a new innovation I have yet to discover on the internet or through other colleagues and Rhode Island practitioners over the last decade.  However, it has recently become a growing part of my practice as more and more people seek legal guidance but not necessarily legal representation in the area of Rhode Island Divorce and Family Law.

Are you seeking legal guidance?  Do you desire to know your legal rights as a situation develops?  Do you need someone to help you along the way but not necessarily represent you?  Perhaps you are the perfect candidate for my Rhode Island Divorce and Family Law Coaching Program.

Feel free to call me to discuss it.  Clients will be taken on a first-come first coached basis and each person will be individually evaluated based upon his or her needs and the cost that would be associated with it.  No rates will be available over the telephone since rates will vary with each individual's needs as determined by the attorney after consultation.   A low-cost consultation of $50 is required for this new service offering.

I look forward to helping those in need of Rhode Island Divorce and Family law services in this new service offering.

Rhode Island divorce lawyers typically consider an uncontested divorce one that is resolved on or before the "Nominal Date" specified on the Summons and Nominal Track Notice contained in the Rhode Island Divorce filing package.  The Nominal date is specified by the Rhode Island Family Court when the Divorce Complaint and other required documents are filed with the court.  The nominal date is set forth both on the Summons and on the Nominal Track Notice both of which are served upon the non-filing spouse.

The Nominal Date typically gives the parties about eight (8) to (10) weeks for the parties to the Rhode Island Divorce to resolve all issues in their divorce.  On the Rhode Island nominal date the the parties come before the court for a 15 minute uncontested hearing (the "Nominal Hearing"). 

The term "nominal hearing" is just as the name implies.  It is a hearing that is truly "in name only".  The word "hearing" typically implies an adversarial process involving the taking of testimony followed by a decision of the court in favor of one or the other of the parties based upon the testimony.

   In a Nominal Hearing, the parties are given the time to place upon the record of the court all facts necessary the court to have jurisdiction over the divorce and the parties as well as all facts and demonstrating what the parties have agreed upon regarding the distribution of the parties assets, debts, medical care provisions, provisions regarding any minor children and any waivers and/or payment of alimony.

    For those seeking a divorce I would like to share with you a recent experience that I wish to share with you that now gives me pause and has caused me to think more about all the divorcing parties I assist.

    On January 15, 2009 I was unfortunate enough to fall on a patch of ice in the parking lot at the apartment complex where I live.  I struck my head a the base of the skull just where the spine meets the skull.  After a "tuning fork" sensation throughout my skull and a a quick sharp pain I seemed fine, so I got up and attended an appointment with a client at the Kent County Family Court.  By the end of the appointment I felt a strange pressure on the back of my head and I began to slur my words.

Approximately by noon I felt a growing pressure on my skull and was in the Emergency Room at Kent County Memorial Hospital.  I was unable to speak or think properly and lost all sense of balance.  For the next five hours I had very little power to move my arms or legs and thinking was exceptionally difficult.  I was exceptionally sleepy and was petrified to fall asleep with the thought that I may never wake up again.

This is enough about me.  The importance about this situation is the attention it called to my law practice, to divorce and to life itself.

I've had cases where people argue over dogs, photos, bed frames, and even the distribution of Christmas ornaments.  My fall was a sobering experience.  It reminded me in no uncertain terms about how foolish we as people often are.  We spend our lives accumulating material possessions and arguing over who will get what in a divorce situation.

In comparison, there is much more to life than the material items we accumulate during life and much time is wasted fighting over those items in a divorce.  The tip to a good uncontested divorce is to focus on life's true values, our ability to move, to talk, to work, to walk and to do the everyday things we take for granted.  Those who fight over meaningless replaceable physical possessions due to some need for a sense of security or some petty need to be vindicated as the "winner" in the divorce are the true losers in divorce battles.

A true uncontested divorce results in minimal time and effort and reaches a reasonable resolution when people realize that a divorce is just as much a chance at a new beginning by a transition from something comfortable to something new and potentially scary.  Yet it adds excitement and vibrancy to life.  If people were truly in love with one another at any time during their marriage, wouldn't they want their spouse to be happy.  Wouldn't a true love want that happiness to exist even if it were not with you?  Otherwise, what was the relationship to begin with?  Is it one person who selfishly wants their spouse to be wonderfully happy but ONLY as long as they remain with YOU and are only happy with YOU?

If your divorce is one that is truly one that is uncontested, then shouldn't both parties realize the true joys of life extend way beyond material goods, beds, chairs, televisions, 401k plans and the like? 

Do you want to move on?  Do you want to have an uncontested divorce that is substantially removed from stress, worry and aggravation?  Learn to give.  Learn that it is not the small replaceable things that make life worth living, but what we are willing to do for our own self-respect and for whatever love your ever had for your spouse.

When you come to terms with the true gifts and benefits of life and stop bickering about life's disposable and replaceable components, then your divorce will become burdenless and more the legal formality it was intended to be than the emotional vendetta too many people escalate it to today.