Rhode Island Divorce Tips by Attorney Chris Pearsall

A Lawyer who Hates Lawyers? What is this RI Divorce Lawyer Really Saying?

Today, I am a Rhode Island lawyer focusing my practice on divorce and divorce coaching.  Looking back decades ago I remember another lawyer who had been practicing in another state for some 40+ years who said something that perplexed me.

* * * Remembering the Lawyer who Hated Lawyers! * * *

The lawyer was about as true, honorable, and generous a gentleman as I have ever met.  He had all the qualities I envisioned a good lawyer would have.  He truly cared about each of his clients.  He fought for each one within the bounds of the law, within his professional code of ethics, and with a high degree of morality. The lawyer knew that I greatly admired him as both a person and as a lawyer.

One extremely hot summer afternoon this lawyer returned to his office after losing a district court hearing.  He plopped himself down in the chair at the opposite end of the short conference room table I was sitting at in his office law library.  His secretary nervously brought him a lemonade and napkin then quickly skirted out of the room.  There was an endless silence.  

Finally, I spoke, 

Chris:  "I'm considering becoming a lawyer."

The lawyer lifted his head, wiped his brow with a napkin, grabbed a nearby law book and flung it across his law library breaking the law book's spine.

It was one of the first times I had ever seen this man so upset.

I was quiet until the lawyer spoke.

Lawyer:  I HATE LAWYERS!

This time the pause was endless yet I was just too puzzled not to speak.

Chris:  "I don't understand!?!  You ARE a lawyer."

The lawyer was quiet again, so I asked it as a question.

Chris:  "How can you hate lawyers when you ARE one? 

The lawyer waited quite awhile before speaking.

Lawyer:  Chris, if you're anything like me, you'll understand when you get there. 

The conversation ended.

* * * 20 Years Later We Agree * * *

I've been working in the legal field now for more than 20 years since that conversation.  

As a Rhode Island lawyer, I am bound by a Professional Code of Ethical Conduct among other things.  There are things that I shouldn't say or do and there are things that I can't say or do despite the right to Free Speech guaranteed to all of us by the United States Constitution.  The layperson would be amazed. 

* * * A Message for Roger * * *

For a point of reference only, the lawyer's name was Roger.

Hopefully he's still alive and hopefully he is in tune enough with today's "internet" that he reads this article.

First, to this great lawyer.

Roger, I was like you.  I understand!

* * * A Message for Readers * * *

Now, to my readers I offer this.

You may not understand this statement until you meet with me.

If you like lawyers, you probably won't like me.

With that said, I can tell you that as a Rhode Island Lawyer who has focused my practice exclusively in the area of divorce and family law, I cannot make your problems go away.  No lawyer can!  Yet some lawyers may tell you they can to get you as a client.

Lawyers can't make your problems go away because fundamentally they are your problems.  Only you can take responsibility for those challenges in your life.  Only you truly have the power to resolve those challenges by your decisions.

However, I can tell you that I can help you understand and get through your Rhode Island divorce or family law challenges by working with you either as your Coach or as your Representative.

* * *  Your Divorce Coaching Program * * *

Roger's words were invaluable.  Today, they are the powerful force motivating the continued growth of your Family Law Coaching program.  

I call it Your Program because it is designed specifically for you.  It is designed to teach you, train you, advise you, inform you, and save you time and money in the areas of divorce and family law.

As Your Coaching Program continues to evolve, it will continue to work faster for you, become more economical for you, and become more helpful for you.

Whatever you choose to believe, there is one thing you can know with certainty. I am one lawyer trying to make a difference for YOU with a new and innovative way of practice designed by hard work, my belief that you can do more than you believe you can at this moment, and your willingness to be open to something new that works. 

What can Your Coaching Program help you with?  Here is a brief list . . .

Rhode Island Divorces & Legal Separations, Rhode Island Child Support Establishment, Modifications, Collections and Terminations, Rhode Island Child Custody Matters and Child Custody Modifications, Rhode Island Petitions to Enforced Marital Settlement Agreements and Property Settlement Agreements, Preparing Pre-Nuptual Agreements and Ante-Nuptual Agreements in Rhode Island, RI Petitions to Move Out of State with Minor Children, Petitions to Establish Paternity in Rhode Island, Rhode Island Motions to Adjudge In Contempt and Defense of those Contempt Motions, Protection from Abuse Petitions and Defense Against Such Petitions, Rhode Island Motions and Petitions to Establish, Modify or Terminate Visitation, RI Common Law Divorces and their Defense, Rhode Island Legal Rights, Rhode Island Family Court Procedures, 2nd Opinions about your Attorney on Rhode Island Divorce Cases, Pro Se Representation (i.e. Representing Yourself Appropriately in Family Court), and many more . . . 

Look for the Testimonials Section about Your Coaching Program which is coming soon.  Feel Free to Call Me for a low-cost Coaching Session!

Attorney Christopher A. Pearsall - Phone: (401) 632-6976

Rhode Island Child Support - Can You Waive it? A Rhode Islander Has a Question for the Rhode Island Divorce Coach.

EMAIL QUESTION TO RI DIVORCE COACH / ATTORNEY CHRISTOPHER PEARSALL: 

I have only one question and need only one answer so I am writing in the hope that you will answer it and not require a full coaching session.  My question is this.  If my daughter stays with me in our divorce, can I waive child support so my wife doesn't pay anything?

ANSWER:  Well, you ask a bit of a loaded question here via an email Sir.  Keep in mind that we as Rhode Island Divorce and Family law lawyers need to make a living too.  I certainly have no desire to be greedy and I can tell you that like many people in Rhode Island I have my share of struggles financially yet I too have a family to care for and bills to pay.  My knowledge of the law and the advice I am able to provide from my knowledge and skill is what pays the bills.  So, please keep in mind that you are essentially asking me to do a little bit of work for you for free without knowing me or even giving me your full name in your email.  However, I will meet you half way since I believe that other people who are going through the Rhode Island family court system can benefit from the general answer to your question.

First, this is a general answer to your question.  This answer is NOT specific to you or your case, nor is this answer legal advice to you.  

Keep in mind that without asking you specific questions about your circumstances in your family, your life, your income, your living conditions, your wife, and your divorce then this answer shouldn't be relied upon by you or anyone else.  

No one should rely upon legal advice in a Rhode Island divorce unless it is given by a licensed and experienced RI family law lawyer who has had the opportunity to listen to you and to question you about your specific situation so that all factors will be taken into consideration when providing you with legal advice. 

Every case is different and that is crucial to remember!  

Alright, let's get to it then.

The general answer to your question is both YES and NO!  

You'll understand better once I explain.

  * * WHY THE ANSWER IS "YES?" * *

I don't know of any law in the Rhode Island General Laws, any Administrative Order included in the Orders of the Rhode Island Family Court, or any case that has been decided by our Rhode Island Supreme Court that strictly prohibits a Rhode Island Family Court Judge from allowing a parent who is awarded placement of a child to "waive" child support for the child.

Therefore, technically THE answer is "YES" because there is nothing that strictly prohibits it.

  * * WHY THE ANSWER IS "NO?" * *

Now let's get to the second part of your answer.  

Rhode Island Family Court and divorces have a practical side to them as well and other laws that affect the decision to this question.

Even though in a divorce the RI Family Court is concerned with helping the parties move forward amicably and equitably, there is an underlying principle that the court holds over and above this.  This principle is that the State of Rhode Island and especially the Rhode Island Family Court has a vested and all-important interest in protecting the best interests of the minor children involved in the system.

Keep in mind that the legal idea of "waiving" something usually means or implies that this will be "permanent."

Even though there is no technical prohibition strictly preventing a family court judge from allowing a placement parent to "waive" child support, the perspective of the family court generally and carried on by most family court judges is that the best interests of a minor child are served when both parents contribute financially to the support of the minor child or children.  It is easy to see how the court could find that the best interests of any minor children are not being looked after if the parent who has the child placed in their home wants to "waive" support for the child.

The Rhode Island Family Court Judges look very cautiously on any parent who does not want to receive child support from the other parent because it is not in the best interests of any child for a parent to voluntarily surrender support that the child is entitled to.  Practically speaking, can you waive child support for a child placed with you?  No, you can't because you are not acting in the best interests of the minor child and chances are better than not that the family court judge will not allow it.  Additionally, it makes you look questionable as the placement parent as to whether you are truly looking out for the best interests of any minor child who is to be placed with you.

The alternative is to ask the court to allow you to "leave child support open."  However, since that diverges from your question, I'll address the concept of leaving child support "open' for another article.

I hope this has been of help to you and that you find my forthright and common sensical approach to Rhode Island Divorce and Family Law to be helpful to understanding what it has taken many of us years to learn through case law, practice and the assistance of judges and fellow colleagues over time.

My best to all of you who go before the Rhode Island Family Court System.  If I might be able to help you either through my NEW, AFFORDABLE and IMPROVED Rhode Island Divorce & Family Law Coaching Program or by representation, please do not hesitate to contact me to set up an affordable Coaching or Advice Session.  You may just be surprised how much I can help you and how much money I can save you in the challenging time you may be facing!  

Authored By:

Christopher A. Pearsall, Attorney-at-Law

Rhode Island's Full-Time Divorce* Lawyer is Now
Rhode Island's Only Divorce and Family Law Coach!!

Discover the Tremendous Benefits You Receive by 

Participating in Family Law Coaching Sessions!

Visit the RhodeIslandDivorceCoach.com

Call (401) 632-6976 Now
to
Schedule Your Low-Cost Rhode Island Divorce* or Family Law* Coaching Session!

Experience the Difference!

Copyright 2007 to Present.  Christopher A. Pearsall, Esquire
 Offering Rhode Island Rhode Island Divorce and Family Law Coaching for a New Millenium!

* The Rhode Island Supreme Court licenses all attorneys in the general practice of law.  The court does not license or certify any lawyer as an expert or specialist in any particular field of practice.

- - Recommended Websites - -

Pearsall.net | AttorneyPearsall.com | Rhode Island Divorce Tips | ChristopherPearsall.com | GuaranteedWealth.com | Rhode Island Divorce Attorney | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyer | ChrisPearsall.com | LegalScholar.com | Pearsall-Law-Associates.com | Rhode Island Divorce Attorneys | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyers | Rhode Island Divorce Coach  |  RI Divorce Coach | RI Divorce Lawyer on Twitter | Rhode Island Divorce Coach on Twitter | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyer on Facebook.com| Attorney Chris Pearsall at LawGuru.com | Rhode Island Family Law Lawyer - RI Consumer Tips

The Rhode Island Divorce Lawyer and Family Law Coach serving Warwick, RI: Living Separate Lives, but Not Divorced

Do You Need Divorce Coaching or Legal Representation?  Consider this Example.

On a whimsical impulse Carrie and Jack got married in Las Vegas, Nevada in 1992 while on vacation with friends.  They remained married and living together for seven months in Rhode Island where Carried had her job and family and Jack was stationed in Newport with the military at NUSC.  

The marriage quickly deteriorated after Jack discovered that Carrie was a verbally abusive and sometimes violent alcoholic.  When Jack refused to buy Carrie alcoholic beverages of any kind, Carrie moved out.  Even though all the furnishings and other assets belonged to Jack before the two got married, Jack agreed to give Carrie everything.  Jack felt bad for Carrie and he went so far as to engage professional movers to pack up and move all the furnishings in their apartment to wherever Carried wanted them moved.  The only things Jack did not give to Carrie were the things that were provided to them by the US Military because he had no right to give them away.

Carrie left with 95% of everything and Jack kept only a few minor things that were needed for his survival in the apartment.  Jack went so far as to set up a military allotment to be deposited in an account of Carrie's choosing for half of the military pay he received each pay period.  Carrie's allotment was set up to last for an indefinite period of time.

Both Carrie and Jack were aware that as long as they remained married the military would provide Jack with an additional amount of money each pay period as long as he was classified as "married."  

Carrie and Jack each went their separate ways and verbally agreed to live their own lives under these circumstances.  Jack didn't want to hurt Carrie and realized she had a problem so he did not file for divorce.  Carrie did not seek any form of rehabilitation but she knew that if she filed for divorce she would get less money from Jack, so she never filed either.

Finally, Jack retired from the military in 2000 and the allotment to Carrie ceased pursuant to the military's own administrative guidelines.  Jack then began receiving a military pension for his 20 years of military service.

When the military allotment ceased, Carrie sought legal advice in Rhode Island where she had been living for the past 12 years and made a substantial claim for Jack's pension and other assets he had accumulated while they had been living separately.

Jack was surprised to learn that although the Rhode Island judge could certainly consider the totality of the circumstances surrounding the divorce, Rhode Island law did allow Carrie to claim that at least a portion of Jack's military pension was "marital" because it accrued while the parties were legally married and absent a Rhode Island or Federal Law which instructed the Rhode Island Family Court otherwise, the pension could be considered marital if the court made a finding that all or a portion of the pension was marital and should be equitably split between the parties as the court saw fit after trial.

Jack was not happy about the divorce proceedings.  All this time he thought he had "done the right thing" for Carrie and now she wanted even more and Jack didn't want to give more.  Jack felt he had given enough and he was willing to fight for his military pension as a non-marital asset because he had already given Carrie what amounted to more than her share.  In Jack's eyes he had already given more than he would have been ordered to give by any divorce court.

Perhaps the greatest thing to keep in mind regarding a scenario where you and your spouse separate all your assets and debts and live completely separate but you do not terminate your marriage legally is this. . . YOU ARE STILL MARRIED!

Can you answer these questions?

1.  Can Jack argue that since he and Carrie separated everything at the time they personally terminated their own marital relationship with each other that any asset accumulated after that time is non-marital?

2.  If Carrie runs up credit card debt in order to support herself during the time that she is separated from Jack, could a Rhode Island Family Court Judge find the credit card debt to be marital debt?

3.  If Carrie builds up an IRA plan during the time she is separated from but still married to Jack, does Jack have a reasonable claim to a part of that IRA plan if he didn't contribute to it?

4.  If Carrie has a child during the time she is separated from Jack and there is no name specified as the father of the child on the birth certificate, is it possible that Jack might have to pay child support for that child?

5.  Are there any federal laws which trump state law regarding any of these issues and decide the question for us so that the question(s) become a non-issue?

6.  Do you see the other eight (8) important legal questions/issues that a skilled divorce lawyer might address with you if you were either Jack or Carrie?  

If you do not see the other important legal questions/issues in this scenario, then you either need some professional RI Divorce Coaching or representation by a good Rhode Island Divorce Lawyer.

Authored By:

Christopher A. Pearsall, Attorney-at-Law

Rhode Island's Full-Time Divorce* Lawyer is Now
Rhode Island's Only Divorce and Family Law Coach!!

Discover the Tremendous Benefits You Receive by 

Participating in Family Law Coaching Sessions!

Consider using the RhodeIslandDivorceCoach.com

Call (401) 632-6976 Now
to
Schedule Your Low-Cost Rhode Island Divorce* or Family Law* Coaching Session!

Experience the Difference!

Copyright 2009.  Christopher A. Pearsall, Esquire
 Offering Rhode Island Rhode Island Divorce and Family Law Coaching for a New Millenium!

* The Rhode Island Supreme Court licenses all attorneys in the general practice of law.  There is no recognition for specialization of attorneys in any area of law.

- - Recommended Websites - -

Pearsall.net | AttorneyPearsall.com | Rhode Island Divorce Tips | ChristopherPearsall.com | GuaranteedWealth.com | Rhode Island Divorce Attorney | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyer | ChrisPearsall.com | LegalScholar.com | Pearsall-Law-Associates.com | Rhode Island Divorce Attorneys | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyers | Rhode Island Divorce Coach  |  RI Divorce Coach | RI Divorce Lawyer on Twitter | Rhode Island Divorce Coach on Twitter | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyer on Facebook.com | Rhode Island Home Buying Tips | Attorney Chris Pearsall at LawGuru.com

Rhode Island Child Custody Question: Taking the Kids Out of State

Question:  

Can my girlfriend move our kids out of state if i disagree?

Answer:

Without an Order from the Family Court prohibiting your girlfriend from moving your natural biological children, or legally adopted children out of the State of Rhode Island, then, Yes, there is nothing to prevent your girlfriend from moving out of Rhode Island with the children if she is the natural biological mother of the children or the lawful mother by adoption. If you want to stop this you would need to take immediate court action. Feel free to call me for a low-cost coaching session on how to do this.

I wish you the best in this difficult situation in your life.

Authored By:

Christopher A. Pearsall, Attorney-at-Law

Rhode Island's Full-Time Divorce* Lawyer is Now
Rhode Island's Only Divorce and Family Law Coach!!

Discover the Tremendous Benefits You Receive by 

Participating in Family Law Coaching Sessions!

Go to RhodeIslandDivorceCoach.com
Call (401) 632-6976 Now
to
Schedule Your Low-Cost Rhode Island Divorce* or Family Law* Coaching Session!

Copyright 2009.  Christopher A. Pearsall, Esquire
 Offering Divorce and Family Law Coaching for a New Millenium!

* Rhode Island licenses all attorneys in the general practice of law.

- - Recommended Websites - -

Pearsall.net | AttorneyPearsall.com | Rhode Island Divorce Tips | ChristopherPearsall.com | GuaranteedWealth.com | Rhode Island Divorce Attorney | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyer | ChrisPearsall.com | LegalScholar.com | Pearsall-Law-Associates.com | Rhode Island Divorce Attorneys | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyers | Rhode Island Divorce Coach  |  RI Divorce Coach | RI Divorce Lawyer on Twitter | Rhode Island Divorce Coach on Twitter | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyer on Facebook.com | Rhode Island Home Buying Tips | 

The Danger of Rhode Island Child Support Modification Provisions via Marital Settlement Agreements!

Sitting in the Rhode Island Family Courts for many years I have seen Post Divorce issues arise. Few situations are more disturbing than what I call "the private child support modification."

If you've been reading this or any of my other Rhode Island divorce websites, you know that I usually explain by use of examples and analogous situations since nothing seems to teach more strongly than a good story.  Since most of the compliments on my websites are the use of these stories, I won't diverge from that here.

* * Milton's Case of the Modified Child Support * *

It was difficult to sit in my seat as the judge rendered the decision.  It was most certainly a decision that made Milton cringe as his ex-wife MaryLou laughed at him gleefully.  Milton would not be able to stop the fact that his ex-wife had deceived him and would now reap extra money from him by putting their Rhode Island Child Support Modification as merely an amendment to their Marital Settlement Agreement.

Let's roll back a bit, as Rhode Island Child Support Lawyers do, I am getting ahead of myself again.

<Click Here to See the Full Article>

Authored By:

Christopher A. Pearsall, Attorney-at-Law

Rhode Island's Full-Time Divorce* Lawyer is Now
Rhode Island's Only Full-Time Divorce Coach!!

Call (401) 632-6976 Now
and
Schedule Your Rhode Island Divorce* or Family Law* Coaching Session Now!

Copyright 2009.  Christopher A. Pearsall, Esquire
A New Rhode Island Divorce Lawyer and Coach for a New Millenium!

* Rhode Island licenses all attorneys in the general practice of law.

- - Recommended Websites - -

Pearsall.net | AttorneyPearsall.com | Rhode Island Divorce Tips | ChristopherPearsall.com | GuaranteedWealth.com | Rhode Island Divorce Attorney | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyer | ChrisPearsall.com | LegalScholar.com | Pearsall-Law-Associates.com | Rhode Island Divorce Attorneys | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyers | WholesaleQuiltBatting.com  | Rhode Island Divorce Coach  |  RI Divorce Coach | RI Divorce Lawyer on Twitter | Rhode Island Divorce Coach on Twitter | Rhode Island Divorce Lawyer on Facebook.com